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Jul. 28th, 2020 04:29 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
theladysnarkydame I picked up Chad's ashes today. In a box, not an urn, because I'm not going to keep them - I'm going to spread them somewhere he loved. The box is both surprisingly heavy and far too light.
And I got the certified copies of the death certificate (two weeks earlier than expected! yay?). Which means I should start informing all the various organizations that need to be informed, I guess.
I called up our internet provider, because I managed to lock the online account trying to guess Chad's password - he only ever used a handful of variations on two main passwords, but I guessed wrong too many times. And that was surprisingly difficult - I think it was because the guy on the phone was the same guy that set up our internet in December - he was super nice then, and super nice now, and remembered Chad fondly, which just made me sob on the phone (poor internet guy). But they helped me reset the password, so that's sorted.
Then I logged into every subscription account I could think of under his name - Google, Netflix, Hulu, Microsoft Game Pass, Playstation Plus, etc etc etc - mostly painless. It might be otherwise if I decide to cancel any of them (or remove the family options and just keep one subscription), but for now, I just changed the payment info to my own card. I left them attached to his email - can't bring myself to change that yet.
Tomorrow, I'll talk to Social Security, and our mortgage company, and our insurance company, and go to the bank. I'm sure I'll cry there too, but at least I'll be wearing a mask. That helps.
I'll need to talk to his union soon, to sort out any lingering questions about pensions (probably not a thing, he'd only worked there a few years) or benefits - though that might be taken care of already. His HR contact seemed to have that covered. But I should check. And I'm waiting for some life insurance paperwork to come in the mail - hopefully soon.
I'm not sure how long I'll feel like I'm teetering between composure and . . . not that. It's exhausting.
I want, so much, to just go on that camping trip, and be alone with my memories and the trees and the water and the mountains - to be able to sob without witnesses, until I'm done. But not yet. I'll take a few days to deal with the formalities, and arrange campsite reservations, and convince someone to catsit while I'm gone.
And then I'll find someplace beautiful to let him go.
And I got the certified copies of the death certificate (two weeks earlier than expected! yay?). Which means I should start informing all the various organizations that need to be informed, I guess.
I called up our internet provider, because I managed to lock the online account trying to guess Chad's password - he only ever used a handful of variations on two main passwords, but I guessed wrong too many times. And that was surprisingly difficult - I think it was because the guy on the phone was the same guy that set up our internet in December - he was super nice then, and super nice now, and remembered Chad fondly, which just made me sob on the phone (poor internet guy). But they helped me reset the password, so that's sorted.
Then I logged into every subscription account I could think of under his name - Google, Netflix, Hulu, Microsoft Game Pass, Playstation Plus, etc etc etc - mostly painless. It might be otherwise if I decide to cancel any of them (or remove the family options and just keep one subscription), but for now, I just changed the payment info to my own card. I left them attached to his email - can't bring myself to change that yet.
Tomorrow, I'll talk to Social Security, and our mortgage company, and our insurance company, and go to the bank. I'm sure I'll cry there too, but at least I'll be wearing a mask. That helps.
I'll need to talk to his union soon, to sort out any lingering questions about pensions (probably not a thing, he'd only worked there a few years) or benefits - though that might be taken care of already. His HR contact seemed to have that covered. But I should check. And I'm waiting for some life insurance paperwork to come in the mail - hopefully soon.
I'm not sure how long I'll feel like I'm teetering between composure and . . . not that. It's exhausting.
I want, so much, to just go on that camping trip, and be alone with my memories and the trees and the water and the mountains - to be able to sob without witnesses, until I'm done. But not yet. I'll take a few days to deal with the formalities, and arrange campsite reservations, and convince someone to catsit while I'm gone.
And then I'll find someplace beautiful to let him go.
no subject
Date: 2020-07-29 06:26 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-07-29 11:07 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-07-29 03:08 pm (UTC)