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I don't like stress. I don't DO stress -- I am quite firmly in the "if you can do something about it, why stress? If you can't, why stress?" camp -- but regardless, I am . . . stressed. Ish. As stressed as I get, anyway.
I applied for a promotion a couple of months ago, fully expecting everything to take a long time to sort out -- but there's still been no kind of definitive, or even semi-definitive, word one way or another. I finally got to sit down with the District Manager, and I think that went well, but there is still supposed to be a peer interview, probably at another store so it would be more neutral territory (as opposed to "peer interviewing" with someone at my own store, who I've worked with for years), and there's been nothing at all resembling a timeline for that. So who knows. I don't know.
And I kind of need to know.
See, Boy is moving back to Seattle after October -- this is not a surprise, and though I'm not happy about it, I support his reasons for going back. I just want to move out there myself, sooner rather than later.
Now, I have OPINIONS about people moving cross-country to be with their significant others. It's a risky thing to do. But I've been vaguely planning on moving out to either Seattle or Portland for a long time -- the only reason I haven't yet is because I'm comfortable in my job, in this apartment, being close to family -- I've been here 30 years! There may be a bit of a rut -- I haven't really been motivated enough to set definitive goals. And I'm bad at saving money.
Which brings us back to the job -- I make decent money now. Not fantastic money, and I have too much credit card debt and not really any savings at all, but decent money. Enough that I COULD save up enough for a cross country move if I was sufficiently motivated. And I am, now. And getting that promotion would definitely speed that up.
BUT. Getting that promotion would also make me want to stick around longer, so that I wouldn't be leaving the people I work with in a lurch. I like these people. I'd feel bad. So I almost feel like I should withdraw my application.
BUT. While I could leave a lot of my stuff behind, I'm not really willing to ditch EVERYTHING. Most of my furniture I could leave, but my dad built three of my bookshelves, and my blanket chest was my great-aunt's, and I have A LOT OF BOOKS -- mostly paperbacks, thankfully, but still, that's several heavy boxes. And my three cats? Not leaving them behind. No.
Which means I'd pretty much have to rent a truck. And with rental costs, and gas, and at least two, maybe three nights in a motel, and food for the road, and getting the cats up to date on vaccinations (and ID tags, and collars -- which they'd have to get used to -- new pet carriers, and maybe harnesses for rest stops?) I'm looking at probably $3000 or $3500 for the move. Which doesn't really include a deposit on a new apartment (I'm not counting on Boy to already have one I could move into, because of those OPINIONS I mentioned before -- though if all goes well we'd get one together pretty soon) but I should get enough back from my current place to make that less of a thing.
Which makes me really want that promotion, and the raise that would go with it.
Which is making my thoughts go all circle-ly and uselessly stressed-like.
And I didn't get my Big Bang draft done. Not even close.
Sigh.
I applied for a promotion a couple of months ago, fully expecting everything to take a long time to sort out -- but there's still been no kind of definitive, or even semi-definitive, word one way or another. I finally got to sit down with the District Manager, and I think that went well, but there is still supposed to be a peer interview, probably at another store so it would be more neutral territory (as opposed to "peer interviewing" with someone at my own store, who I've worked with for years), and there's been nothing at all resembling a timeline for that. So who knows. I don't know.
And I kind of need to know.
See, Boy is moving back to Seattle after October -- this is not a surprise, and though I'm not happy about it, I support his reasons for going back. I just want to move out there myself, sooner rather than later.
Now, I have OPINIONS about people moving cross-country to be with their significant others. It's a risky thing to do. But I've been vaguely planning on moving out to either Seattle or Portland for a long time -- the only reason I haven't yet is because I'm comfortable in my job, in this apartment, being close to family -- I've been here 30 years! There may be a bit of a rut -- I haven't really been motivated enough to set definitive goals. And I'm bad at saving money.
Which brings us back to the job -- I make decent money now. Not fantastic money, and I have too much credit card debt and not really any savings at all, but decent money. Enough that I COULD save up enough for a cross country move if I was sufficiently motivated. And I am, now. And getting that promotion would definitely speed that up.
BUT. Getting that promotion would also make me want to stick around longer, so that I wouldn't be leaving the people I work with in a lurch. I like these people. I'd feel bad. So I almost feel like I should withdraw my application.
BUT. While I could leave a lot of my stuff behind, I'm not really willing to ditch EVERYTHING. Most of my furniture I could leave, but my dad built three of my bookshelves, and my blanket chest was my great-aunt's, and I have A LOT OF BOOKS -- mostly paperbacks, thankfully, but still, that's several heavy boxes. And my three cats? Not leaving them behind. No.
Which means I'd pretty much have to rent a truck. And with rental costs, and gas, and at least two, maybe three nights in a motel, and food for the road, and getting the cats up to date on vaccinations (and ID tags, and collars -- which they'd have to get used to -- new pet carriers, and maybe harnesses for rest stops?) I'm looking at probably $3000 or $3500 for the move. Which doesn't really include a deposit on a new apartment (I'm not counting on Boy to already have one I could move into, because of those OPINIONS I mentioned before -- though if all goes well we'd get one together pretty soon) but I should get enough back from my current place to make that less of a thing.
Which makes me really want that promotion, and the raise that would go with it.
Which is making my thoughts go all circle-ly and uselessly stressed-like.
And I didn't get my Big Bang draft done. Not even close.
Sigh.
